Those of you who know me know I'm scared of birds.
While I have not actually sustained an injury from a bird, I'm still terrified of them. I believe this stems from one of my primary school teachers showing us the Alfred Hitchcock movie, The Birds. I have never seen a scarier movie! And you know, when you tell people you are scared of birds they proceed to tell you any bird horror story they've ever heard. Like the kid who was riding their bike and got swooped by a magpie and rode in front a car, was hit and ended up in ICU!
Today I realized how bad my fear was. I was walking home from work and got swooped by a Cockie!!! It screeched it's awful screech and flew at me. I was on a main road so I ran out to the bike lane screaming and realized there was more than one Cockie, in a diamond shape in trees around me. Next option of crossing the road was no longer an option as there was one there too. I rang Clarence crying and hysterical (yeah, told you I was scared...). He talked to me and I walked slowly down the bike path trying not to lose it completely. They kept screeching, I kept crying and crouched behind a car and then Clarence calmed me down enough so that I could keep walking. He is definitely walking to work with me tomorrow. I've been swooped in the same place before. Maybe Cockies are like Magpies, they remember people and swoop the same people in the same place every year. Dr Harry said it, it must be true.
I was going to cancel my gym membership this week because I'm really enjoying walking, but what will I do in crazy mating month?? That's October. I already cross to the other side of the road in non crazy mating month if there's a bird on the footpath. A few weeks ago there was a huge peacock, it was touch and go on my walk!
A stack hat is looking like an option. Or an ice-cream container with a face painted on it.
3 comments:
Oh you poor thing! Why do you have birds across the top of your page! New page design I say! A magpie refusing to move made me change my jogging path this morning. I'm not looking forward to the next few months either. Such nice weather in the mornings, with such danger lurking.
I know, I actually thought about that when I selected it... I will work on changing it. Clarence told me to punch it if it landed on me, but what gets me is that they don't care, they aren't intimidated by humans and they have beaks and claws and I fear them gouging my eyes out and not caring that I'm fighting them off. I'm not scared of birds that are scared of humans, just the scary, non-intimidated by us kind!
Franni - I totally get it. I can't stand birds either. When I first got to Oz in 2005, a random person told me about swooping magpies, and he said his dad bought a hat and stuck fake eyes on the back of it.. and it kept the magpies away from him because they are afraid of eye contact. A bit strange, but might be worth a shot if it works.
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